Sunday, December 27, 2009
My new therapist
When I got home, it ALL came boiling to the top. Everything that has been frustrating me over the last who knows how long started to spew out. I know nursing a baby when you are an emotional wreck is nearly impossible, but I hoped that he would finish eating so that he would sleep through the night. Thankfully he quickly got down to business. After a couple minutes he stopped, looked at me with the biggest blues eyes he could manage and smiled. My heart melted. How could I stay upset when this perfect little angel was looking at me, solely focused on me, as if to say 'Mommy, it's going to be ok.'
Like I said, he's new at his job, but really, really good at it.
Friday, November 27, 2009
Dreams
In the last months of my pregnancy I dreamt almost every night. Now, for some reason, my dreams involve explosive poo, incessant crying and the fear that Gauge is lying on my chest while I'm in bed, and I can't move him. Oh, and people (usually older women) telling me I'm a poor mother. 2 of those 4 haunt me during the day too.
Thursday, November 5, 2009
Sven the Stubborn Swede
We arrived at the hospital at 7:30 am on Friday the 30th, and quickly learned we were not going to go home, as they were going to start the birth process. Turns out I was 3cm dilated when they first checked, and labour came quickly, and progressed fairly well through the day. Motorcycle Mama came up to help and by the early evening, the day nurses figured there would be a baby before their shift was over... BUT Sven a.k.a. Gauge, had other plans. By early evening, I was completely dilated and ready to give birth, but no sign of the baby. Later in the evening, he still hadn't moved down the birth canal as one might expect, so the attending obstetrician went in for a feel and discovered his head was in the wrong position. There was still room, so she tried to turn his head into the proper position. Now, if you've never given birth, you might want to skip the next couple of sentences...
Despite the epidural, it was the worst pain imaginable. I laugh at it now, but I have never screamed so loud in my entire life. Errol declared he will think twice about how a cow feels when he does the same thing during calving season... A few good tugs and turns and his head didn't budge. Our options were forceps and a very difficult birth, or C-section. I was so tired I opted for the section.Preparations were made and off to the OR we went. Errol was able to join me and we waited while the obstetrician and her team worked. At 12:33am on Oct 31, our baby boy Gauge was born... in his own special way. When the obstetrician went into the uterus to retreive him by his head, he slipped from her grasp, did a 180, zipped past her and jumped into my abdominal cavity, where she pulled him out by his bum. In all the years she's practiced, she has never seen a baby do that. There were a few extra repairs to be made, and I was out of recovery and in my room by 4am. Errol, Gauge and Motorcycle Mama were all eagerly expecting my arrival, and we chilled until 5am when I could no longer keep my eyes open.
Gauge did great at the beginning. He latched well, was bright and alert, and just a joy to have around. However, not wanting to leave the hospital, he decided to be stubborn, and ended up with jaundice. Instead of going home after 3 days, he spent another 2 days in an infant "tanning" bed treating it. Thankfully he responded well and we were able to come home on Nov. 4th. We were so thankful to find a fridge full of quick to prepare food, and several more care packages arrived during the afternoon.
Now the real fun begins. When we got home, we looked at him and wondered "now what?" We've discovered that he's alot like me and needs to eat on a schedule and becomes completely inconsolable if food is late in arriving. So, every hour we rouse him, fight stubbornly to feed him, and eventually all fall away tired (and me hungry) from the ordeal. He's just showing mommy and daddy (and Motorcycle Mama) whose boss. But. Our little angel is just that and is touching the lives of those around us already.
Friday, October 23, 2009
Lessons to learn
Which leads me to my next lesson... children learn very early on, how to run their parents' lives. From the time they are barely a spec on an ultrasound screen, they influence how frequently their mother visits the bathroom, when she eats, what she eats, how much and well she sleeps and subsequently how much and well their father sleeps. But they don't really start to shine in this until the last few weeks of pregnancy. Based on experience and what others have told me, women are usually done with being pregnant several weeks before they actually give birth. The awkwardness, sore everything, poor infrequent sleep and constant potty breaks just become too much. Babies on the other hand, at least 75% of them, seem quite content to hang out in utero where it's warm and cozy, for as long as they can. Doesn't matter how many pep talks I give it, with promises of more room to stretch and cousins and friends to play with, and lots and lots of love, still no signs of coming any time soon.
Patience girl, patience.
Saturday, October 17, 2009
I'm Crazy
Up for a challenge - check
Crazy - check
I'm due to have a baby in 4 days. 4 DAYS!! So really, it could come any time now. Guess how I've spent my Saturday so far... preparing and canning salsa. I had so many ripe tomatoes and a few green peppers, I had to do something with them, especially since I cultivated and nurtured them all summer. So I made salsa. I still have enough tomatoes to make another 2 or 3 batches of the spicy condiment, but they aren't ready yet. Depending on when this baby comes, I might find my crazy self making another batch. So real is that possibility that the last time I was in town, I bought crushed pineapple so I could make a tropical kind next time. Oi.
This year, I was more prepared though, having procured a huge canning pot from Errol's grandma and some essential tools to help make the process easier. So far so good, as it seems all my jars have sealed. And it tastes pretty good too!
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
2 Weeks - We're Ready.
I'm tired of puffy marshmallow feet, tingly carpal tunnel hands, and awkward position changes when I'm trying to sleep between pee breaks. I (think I) am ready to give birth. But, we also have the nursery, except for a few nails in the trim and some curtain rods, ready. It's exactly what I envisioned and am quite pleased with how our project turned out.
By the way.... this is what the room used to look like. An improvement no?
Word of the Day
One more reason to love international travel.
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
It's as big as my house
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
Stats
This Labour Day Monday, I set aside most of my regular household cleaning, to wash outside windows, finish painting a dresser for Baby V, do a little bit of laundry, finish stenciling the kitchen and dining room and day dream of all of the other mini projects I want to finish before Baby V comes. The day ended with visiting with family and friends and a piece of "Happy Biithday" cake.
I still found time to put my feet up. Mostly so they wouldn’t swell to the size of watermelons by the end of the day.
P.S. Motorcycle Mama - you should see the list I have for us.
Friday, August 28, 2009
Baby's Got Talent
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
2 months = 9 weeks = excitement & trepidation
Regardless of how much time we have left… I’m thankful for many things.
1) Continuing health. I still feel great. Lumbering and awkward most of the time, but I get around energetically.
2) A wonderful, understanding husband. He will make us lunch when I'm too caught up in work things to get started early, make the bed before I get to it, dispose of drowned mice from my rain barrels, and save me from being dive bombed by moths. He'll even rub my dirty, swollen feet and ankles after a long day of doing whatever and push me out of the couch when I just can't get up. He is a good man, an excellent husband, and will make a great dad. Whether he's ready or not.
3) Our garage. It is finally being built. The foundation is ready for the cement (hopefully coming on Friday), the walls and rafters will be up in no time. I will never again have to scrape snow and ice from my SUV before I leave home. Pure bliss.
4) Free furniture. We don’t have time to go to the city together to shop for a car seat, much less nursery furniture. At the rate we're going, we'll pick up the car seat on the way to the hospital. But I’m so thankful there are those around us looking to purge. Lovin' the hand-me-downs.
5) A cool basement office. Though I didn’t get to take much advantage of how much cooler it is than upstairs this summer. We have been plagued with a very cool, wet summer. Hardly a day above 25C. I will gladly suffer a week of +30 for the benefit of everyone else deprived of a proper summer this year.
So Baby, while we can't wait to meet you and shower you with our love... please, please, please wait until October 21st. Any sooner, and you might be sleeping in the car seat box.
Monday, August 10, 2009
What a Lovely Sound
After many months of waiting and being told it wouldn't get done this year, the contractor FINALLY showed up this morning to start work on our garage. We will have a garage before winter returns.
Today, the bobcat is here to do the landscaping, which should take a day or two. Once it's done, the cement will be poured, and our neighbour will start framing the walls on his days off. When he's done, the contractor crew will return to put up the rafters and walls and our neighbour will finish things up.
I'm so happy. Beyond.
Now... if we can only get ahold of the plumber to get our furnace installed before winter...
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
A Blessing in Disguise
The location of my garden is where Errol’s grandma (who lived in a now demolished house near where our house, from the other grandma, stands). She favoured potatoes. Her garden, I’m told, was huge and produced enough potatoes to feed the WHOLE family through the winter, including lefse at Christmas time. My hope was to refresh the soil’s memory, and capture some of its past growing prowess. I opted to go small, since this is my first garden, and I am going to have a big belly to contend with come harvest time. I planted rows of corn, beets, radish, lettuce, cucumbers, carrots and peas and dreamed of eating fresh veggies well into the fall. I diligently weeded my garden, to help the new plants grow, and watered when I could. And then the weather turned and threatened to freeze my burgeoning garden. On June 6th, when the radio said it was going to be -3C overnight, Errol and I quickly covered the tiny seeds and plants with more dirt, and hoped for the best.
Short of 6 corn plants that poked through a week or so later, and nothing else grew. I felt like I had failed as a gardener, and cringed every time I saw someone else’s, far lusher garden. I even cried once for my garden (though I’m pretty sure that it was just the pregnancy hormones crying) and allowed myself to briefly think that if I couldn’t grow a garden, how will I ever raise a child?
I have since decided that I am not completely incompetent, and though there will be struggles, I will be a good mother. I have managed to coax 18 starter tomato plants and 3 starter cucumber plants into producing fruit. Of the 2 rows of carrots I planted, 6 plants FINALLY poked through. 1 cucumber seed eventually sprouted and is growing nicely, and I might have 1 beet plant growing. Those 6 corn plants survived the frost and a horse running through my garden, and I swear have doubled in size in the last 2 days. Hooray! I re-seeded my peas, and they are beginning to grow, but my re-seeded lettuce still hasn’t poked through. I might just give up on it…
I'm not as discouraged anymore, and am already looking forward doing better on my sophomore garden. Based on the size of my belly now, and what I can expect to be in September, it’s a good thing my garden didn’t turn out as I had originally expected. Now we’ll only have tomatoes, cukes and hopefully a few peppers to do eat and can.
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
And really, I find it much more interesting to look at than the basketball under my shirt. You can see Baby V's nose, lips, chin, an ear, hand and of course it's large head. The ultrasound picture is just about as interesting to stare at as my belly when Baby V starts ferociously kicking and punching me, making my belly pop, ripple and quiver.
Baby V is laying sideways. Head on my left, feet on my right, back or head resting on my pillow-like bladder. Not a fan of this staying still nonsense, so it's always moving, and distracting me from my work.
Saturday, July 4, 2009
For a special lady
One special lady I adopted was Errol's Grandma T. I was taking a quick break from baking up a storm before I head out to mow the law and read May-B's post about her grandma, and thought, I should post about Grandma T! It's hard not to think about her often as we live in her old house and many of her belongings are in daily use (furniture, her specially-made countertops that fit me perfectly, etc.) She's the lady who painted the kitchen, dining room and master bedroom pepto pink. Tomorrow we will celebrate her 90th birthday (i.e. the reason why I'm baking in the summer...)She's lived a fascinating life. She spent a good part of her childhood in the Park Valley area, one daughter of Swedish immigrants. She married and she and her husband eventually settled in this area as well. My mother-in-law is their only daughter, but they took in scads of foster kids, several of whom still stay in touch. Eager to entertain with food, she worked as a cook for many years at the Big Dipper Dining Theatre at Christopher Lake, home of the Cottonpickers and eventually retired and moved to Canwood. Her memory is not great anymore, and she can no longer care for herself, so she lives in the home in Big River. But that hasn't slowed her down. She loves the parties and friends she's made there. She's quick to smile and laugh, and will tease you to make you feel at home.
Happy 90th Grandma T!
Saturday, June 27, 2009
I thought you were as good as gone!
Nope. This morning, it's as cavernous as ever. Showing no signs of ever disappearing. Truth be told, I'm kind of disappointed. I want to see what the end looks like! Early in my pregnancy, I tried to peer into my belly button, certain I would catch a glimpse of Baby V. (I promise, I'm an intelligent, educated person. Just given to the occasional juvenile fantasy, that's all). I think I may have to soon abandon all hope of ever seeing the end.
Friday, May 22, 2009
Surprise!
The next morning, I looked out, and spotted it again, and this time it was nursing on the mare from the big team. She shouldn’t have been pregnant! She never spent any time with any of the studs last spring, always separated at least by a fence. Her belly had been looking mysteriously big the last while, but it was decided that she found lots to eat this winter and was just fat. Errol went out, brought her and her baby to the yard for a little look see. Baby was as big as the foals already 2 weeks old, and solid. No mistake that she is that mare’s baby. As we pieced the mystery together, we decided that the stud that was gelded last spring must have made his last hurrah before being snipped and knocked up ol’ Bonnie through the fence. He’s not very big compared to Bonnie (I maybe come to the bottom of her shoulder if I stand really straight), so it would have been quite the feat. Still no immaculate conception, just incredible acrobatics.
Monday, May 4, 2009
Oysters and Desert Ranching
We were up and at the house for breakfast by 6 Saturday morning. The first of the crew were coming to round up and sort out the calves at 8, so we had to be ready for them. By 8:30 we were in the truck heading to the pasture lead the herd of 200 in with a hay bale, in a sort of pied piper fashion.
Over 50 people came to take in the first branding of the season. Since our branding and vaccinating is much less formal and takes only a couple of hours, this was an event that was totally unique and fun to watch for us. My uncle had jobs for my parents and Errol, but wouldn’t let me wrastle, vaccinate or handle the branding iron, so I was the official videographer.
Each job is necessary. The riders can more easily spot and catch the calves that need to be tended to. The wrastlers immobilize the calves so that the rest of the crew isn’t being kicked by the 200lb feisty 4-legged creature. The branding so that when the cows and calves are let out into the community pastures, the pasture manager can quickly tell which cows and calves belong to which rancher. Most important for when they are sorted and returned to the ranch in the fall. Vaccinating is necessary to keep the herd healthy through the summer and immune to things like the common cold and insects, which can do serious harm. Since only a few bulls are needed to keep the herd going, castrating garners a higher price in the fall. And the marking, well… the big yellow strip means you only pick on a calf once, reducing the amount of stress it goes through during the day.
My dad did the branding (and singed all sorts of hair on his neck, beard and around his ears), my mom vaccinated (and even managed to stick herself with the end of the needle during the last few calves) and Errol wrastled and then roped. He heeled (caught by the back legs) 3 calves. Pretty good for a rookie, having only had a short practice session the night before, and never on a horse! With all the neighbours helping, everything was done by 5 and through supper by 7. Many neighbours stayed for the first “nut feast” of the season. A tradition long held in the south… they batter the bull calf testies and fry ‘em up. Some circles even consider them a delicacy. Everyone gathered in a giant semi-circle around my uncle and the BBQ like a bunch of hungry coyotes, waiting with their toothpicks to snag as many as possible as the bowl went by. Given I’ve tried all sorts of crazy foods, I would have tried on in a heart beat IF I wasn’t pregnant. But I figured it wasn’t a good idea to introduce possibly hormone rich foods into my diet, so I avoided them. Errol tried one, even chewed it a little, before swallowing and chasing it with a coke.
If you want to play cowboy or cowgirl, I recommend checking one out. They are worth the drive, and definitely an exciting experience! Make sure to have an oyster for me.
Saturday, April 25, 2009
Babies, Babies and More Babies (part 2)
Monday, March 23, 2009
The Orphan
On Saturday, we went to check cows, and noticed one that looked like she was calving. Upon closer inspection, she had leaned up against a hay pile, rolled too far, got stuck and died. Thinking that her calf hadn't delivered or she had rolled on top of it, we didn't hold out much hope finding it alive. Then a few cows moved and I noticed a little wet and shivering heifer trying to feed on anything and everything. We had found her calf! So we brought it to the barn, fed her and found a surrogate mother. I'm pleased to report she is doing well with her new mama and should be just fine!
Thursday, March 5, 2009
Babies, Babies and more Babies
Thankfully the weather has mostly cooperated. We've only had 2 nights where it dipped below 20. If only the snow will stay away, and temps keep going up, life will be chaotic, but less worrisome.
In other news, our renos are moving along. We've almost finished painting the basement and will be moving down there this weekend, so that the upstairs, can be mudded and prepped for painting. So exciting.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Winter Travels
Saturday was our skiing day. We started on a few easier hills, but it didn't take long to get our ski legs back (stiff as they were the next day). Half way through the day, we met up with friends/cousins and skiied with them the rest of the day. The one had just had surgery 4 months before. totally impressed and glad to see her on the hill.
Sunday was an 8km (round trip) snowshoe trek up a mountain. It was such a beautiful day. By the time we reached the little cabin atop the mountain (our goal), we were peeling off all sorts of layers. And quickly putting them back on when we took a break. Ok... I was the only one peeling and relayering. Everyone else wore a sensible number of clothes on the trek.
Monday was a 14hour trip home, fraught with Calgary traffic, fog and even a little freezing drizzle. gong show. But such a good trip!
Friday, January 16, 2009
How are you going to spend your weekend?
- Cross Country Skiing
- Sleigh Rides
- Snowman Building
- Snowball Fight
- Snow Angels
- Sledding
- Skating
I'm glad it's warmer, especially since shannon comes home this weekend. (exciting!!!) The cold won't be nearly so shocking. But does it really have to get that warm. The melting and mess and then freezing later in the week (when it will be back to -19C) makes it almost not worth it. I'm actually on the verge of resenting the warmer weather. Is it too much to ask for just -8C?
Saturday, January 3, 2009
It's so pink, it burns.
Just so you understand. The entire upstairs, with the exception of one wall in the living room, the kitchen and the bathroom was covered in wood paneling. But! No more. I started with the hallway. which was time consuming, as there were lots of little sections and trim to remove. But what a difference. The walls are white, and opened up the tiny little hallway so much. Once that was done, I started to tackle the kitchen/dining room. We could tell from a couple of places where the paneling was pulling away from the wall that it was pink under there. But neither of us were prepared with how pink. It's Pepto Pink, and burns my retinas when the morning sun shines in.
But again, it has opened the space up so much, it blows my mind. I'm super excited to fix up the walls, and start painting.